Conan O’Brien is in full victim mode. So much so that he got gunned down. Not once, not twice but three times last night in his debut talk show on TBS.
It’s okay, Coco, we get it. You got screwed by NBC after lasting just seven months as host of “The Tonight Show.” But now you have a whole new ballpark in which to play, and you can really make it your own.
Basic cable isn’t so bad. Just ask Jon Stewart, your new head-to-head competitor at 11 p.m. And your numbers last night were pretty impressive-about 4.2 million viewers tuned in to see you and Andy and your new Basic Cable Band.
Your opening skit was pretty darn funny. Especially the part where you asked Don Draper for a job in 1965, and he told you that you were two years old at the time–and didn’t have any experience in advertising. “I don’t care who you used to be,” said the customer at the fast food restaurant to you, as the cashier. And that’s probably true of your audience as well. But the kids at the birthday party just did not want to hear you clowning around about politics, right? And who knew that Larry King, of all hosts, was actually your guardian angel.
The first time you got shot, trying to get through the guard gate at the lot, was certainly reminiscent of the toll booth scene in “The Godfather”–and probably even more violent. But the second and third times were just a little bit too much. Much as I feel for you and wish you’ll succeed, I just don’t want that much gunfire that soon before bedtime. At that late hour, we could’ve used more of the masturbating (bear) and less of the Mob.
I’m glad that Ricky Gervais is watching out for you, and is far-thinking enough to tape a series of messages for what is sure to be your ever-descending journey through a panopoly of cable channels–and even a local station or two.
At one point during the debut of “Conan,” you mentioned that because Standard Time had just gone into effect, it WAS essentially midnight, and that you were an idiot and a moron. That’s not really true. As was just pointed out in Bill Carter’s book, it was more of a situation in which your attorneys/agents did not negotiate into your NBC contract that you, as host of TTS, would always follow the late local news–as Dave and Jay had in their deals. To think a simple little contract clause allowed all this upheaval in your life is simply staggering.
After the curator of the Leavenworth Nutcracker Museum, you could’ve done a little bit better for your first guest than Seth Rogen, whose over-the-top radio DJ-ish laugh was getting rather annoying, although his spot did provide some insight into how he views women, as when the new “Green Hornet” revealed he wanted to put an engagement ring on his wife-to-be’s nipple.
The new set is nice, with the coastline and ocean view and the movable moon and the fact that there are no barriers between you and the audience. And it was great that you got a chance to jam with one of your musical idols, Jack White.
As you said, and it looks like everything is going to be okay. But then what happened? For the third time, you are battered target practice, the victim of a mob hit. When the reality is, I’m sure your new show will be a big hit.
